I am musing about....
The Pacemaker. My pacemaker.
So I got one. Last Wednesday. Unexpectedly. At the age of 64!
I started noticing that I was light headed with standing. Kept an eye on it. My Physician's Assistant son in law checked my B/P. It was great. Standing B/P-was great. Pulse...was low. Quite low. Mmmm....
Kept watching. Labs (thankfully normal). Eventual ER visit. EKG.
Found out I had a 2nd degree heart block! (an electrical cardiac issue where-by the electrical impulse system is blocked for some reason, causing a problem with the stimulus for a beat not communicating correctly to the actual heart muscle which is responsible for the contraction)
What? When? How?
Within 48 hours of discovering this...I have a new friend. A pacemaker inserted for life. To assure that my heart does not get too low relative to this "electrical conduction" problem. "One of those things".
Well, I am still processing all of this.
Just seems weird.
But I am thankful. Thankful that it was discovered without a huge, dangerous event. Thankful for good doctors, for scientific knowledge and mainly.... for my wonderful, merciful and loving God.
For His protection, peace, presence and help in this journey.
Thankful I am feeling well, over-all.
Thankful that I can look forward to eventually getting back to an active, normal life, Lord willing.
Thankful for praying family and friends.
Thankful for a loving and caring husband.
Thankful for our kids who were able to come this past weekend and help out with odd jobs outside that needed to be done, for their cooking and food prep, and for the welcome, loving and therapeutic distraction that they and their precious children provided us!
And musing about the Ultimate Pacemaker in my life. He who is truly my Life Saver. He who "changes my heart". He who paces my days and fills up the ventricles of my soul's deepest needs.
He who pulsates through my entire being and breathes joy and life into the day to day.
My Jesus. Our Jesus.
Our Life Saver!
Our Ultimate Pace-maker!
"And I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you.." Ezekiel 36:26
BONUS:
I have to share here the wonderful analogy that one of our ministers, Bro. Richard Martin shared on Sunday. He was talking about how he enjoys watching videos of the famous painter, Bob Ross. He shared of how Bob will add a touch of paint, here, a swipe there, a blot there...and soon has a lovely background with sky, clouds...... But then he takes his paint brush, dips it into paint and thrusts an ugly blob of paint onto the canvas. It is like you just can't help thinking...."oh no, what is he doing?"
But he knows exactly what he is doing. He picks up his brush and does what he does. And behold.... a beautiful painting!!
Do you ever feel like the the LORD threw an ugly blob of paint on your life's canvas? This pacemaker, in some ways, feel that way to me. But I trust the Master Painter and will let Him take the brush, trusting and knowing He knows what He is doing. And that "He makes all things beautiful in His time." (Eccles. 3:11)
Update (12/12/23) So thankful for the Lord's goodness in this journey. Was able to resume my active life quite quickly and am feeling so well; all glory to God! I am still kind of "wierded out" at times about this, but I am humbled and thankful for the Lord's mercy and goodness! May we use the health He gives us, for His honor and glory. He is in control. And for that, I am thankful!
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